Moments of My Own | Lindsey White

Moments of my Own
Trigger warning: references to sexual assault, injury, death

Words and music are not always combined to result in “songs”. Poetry and melody have a history of moving together to a variety of rhythms and with diverse outcomes. This work is a departure from my typical artistic practice and highlights connections between words and music in a new way. The three pieces are inspired by separate pivotal moments and connected by the similarity of their honest expression. Please be aware of the following trigger warnings: sexual assault, injury, death.

“Not a Mistake” is a poem supported by music that is also my “me too” (assault) story. I’ve considered the impact of sharing my experience with freezing during trauma, as it may have value for others who have encountered similar events. (Hopefully requiring fewer years of therapy to realize the normalcy of this response.) Links at the end of this video may connect others with resources and support, such as crisis counselling.

“She Didn’t Know” is an a cappella vocal song, written about a time when I lost my ability to safely play musical instruments, due to physical limitation. I wrote this in effort to forgive myself for ways I had unknowingly contributed to this period of increased disability. I have a genetic, connective tissue disorder called HEDS (Hypermobile Ehlers Danlos Syndrome) in addition to injuries resulting from several motor vehicle accidents. Difficulties surrounding the health of my spine have greatly affected my artistic practice, as well as every other area of my life. Others in the chronic illness community regularly struggle with self-blame after flare ups or re-injury. My hope is that their encountering of this piece may potentially serve to foster self-compassion outwardly, as it has for me on a personal level.

“6 Second Phone Call” is a meditation on a moment of transition and clarity. It could be about many such moments; we have all encountered unexpected and rapid change, however differently. This piece is less about repetition and more about becoming lost in a moment’s significance, clarifying the need for acceptance as it lands.

It was meaningful for me to work with my voice as a primary instrument throughout the composition of these pieces. Throughout my career, I have encouraged creative expression, shared from a place of honest vulnerability and experienced the power of raising our voices. By practicing a variety of expression vocally (with speaking, humming and singing) I was able to translate some of the challenges from these experiences into the language of the healed and healing.

Poster Description
This is a poster for musician Lindsey White’s online show. On a dark green background in the upper left corner, white text reads “LINDSEY WHITE:”, followed by the show title “MOMENTS OF MY OWN” and details: “OPENS FEB 4 2022 AT AANM.CA/ONLINE-EXHIBITIONS” in the upper right on a background of sage green. In the centre is a portrait of Lindsey, who is a white woman with shoulder-length wavey dark brown hair. She is wearing a black sleeveless top and smiling. Photo credit is Matt Duboff. Along the left is Lindsey White’s name, oriented vertically to one side, in Western-style fancy script. The middle of the poster is a turquoise-tinted image of handwritten notebook pages scattered on a wooden floor. Below, on a white rectangular background, dark text reads: “Arts AccessAbility Network Manitoba hosts online shows each month exhibiting the work of Canadian artists with disabilities. AANM supports artistic excellence, boosts visibility of these artists, and promotes policies and practices that make the arts more accessible to all.” At the bottom of the poster, on a turquoise background, are the logos for Canada Council of the Arts and Arts AccessAbility Network Manitoba.